Sunday, December 09, 2007

Unsticky

Ugh. Things just aren't going so great in our journey to conceive a child. I'm having another miscarriage right now. My second miscarriage and third pregnancy loss...all in a row. The nurse who is working with me has suggested I see a fertility specialist (a reproductive endocrinologist) to figure out what might be wrong. But, they typically wait until you have 3 or more unexplained miscarriages and I've only had 2. So, we will try (in the future) one more time. Hopefully I won't need to see a specialist and it will work out that time. But, I will expect the worst and hope for the best. I need to remember how lucky I am...that I can catch the egg. Now, I just need it to stay with me more than a few days. We knew this one was coming because I was having blood tests every other day to make sure things looked alright. We learned right away that we were doomed, so at least it wasn't a surprise. They tested my thyroid for problems this time around and nothing was out of the ordinary. I know it will happen for us one day; it's just a hard journey where each loss feels so traumatic yet is old news to those around you.
I'll keep you posted, of course, if any developments happen in that area of my life. This blog, "Megan creates..." is about creating. It's about creating art, design, and creating each day. It's even about my attempts to create life. A task I have very little control of and one that is harder than I ever imagined. The word create can mean so many things and doesn't always mean in the way of creativity. It's about waking up each morning and knowing you are working with a blank canvas and each decision you make that day shapes and molds your experience. Whether you're creating a fabulous meal, a mess, a cozy nest to live in, a marriage, or a snazzy career...
Onto a different side of my life: work. I've completed lots of personalized letterpress orders this week and it's been so much fun to work on them. I'm really getting the hang of my press and the little things I need to do to keep it working. My press is in my basement studio space where it is cold. So, in summer I have to adjust the tape on the rails to be one way while it's warm while in winter I adjust them differently. I've got it down so I don't need to experiment anymore...it always seems to be a set formula for the tape. Finally, I get even prints every time. Progress! This makes it easier since I have a few more projects to print this week and I really need everything to cooperate! Stay tuned tomorrow as I'll show my latest shop item.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Thanks for sharing about your journey. It helps others, like me, to be encouraged during the ups and down on this road to create.

Deidre

Schmoops said...

hi honey ~

i am so sorry to read about this, i just saw your comment on boho's blog and wanted to reach out.

i am in no way diagnosing you or saying this is what you should do, but i wanted to share that when i became pregnant the third time after two miscarriages in a row, my doctor put me on progesterone supplements immediately to help things "stick".

he also has me on a daily baby aspirin in case the miscarriage was due to clotting.

we don't know why i lost two pregnancies, as all my tests came back fine, and both of these were experiments to see if this pregnancy would hold. i am 23 weeks along in this moment. i am convinced the progesterone was a huge reason for this.

i know there are no answers sometimes but perhaps talking to a doctor who understands that waiting for the third loss is not an option..

take care angel

xoxo

Colorsonmymind said...

Megan-
I have been absent from here again. pfft.

This sucks baby-I am so sorry. As you know I have been there and I wanted to tell you-you can always call me or email if you need.

I am glad you have been mastering your letterpress.

Love and hugs
Thea